The sound of silence..

I have had a LOT of things on my mind recently. Thinking about relationship stuff and contemplating things about God and my relationship with him. I've been having a lot of decisions on my mind. Decisions about relationships, where I'll be living next year, and what I'll do this summer. Sometimes I wonder and worry about these things so much. I pray and pray and pray and wonder why I'm not getting any answers. I just want a billboard telling me which way to go.

Then in class today Prof. Fuentes started sharing something about a Proverb that somehow fits with Music Theory. I don't really remember the connection to Music Theory, but he mentioned the Proverb that goes something like this: A man makes decisions but the Lord guides his steps (that's not word for word, so don't quote me). Anyway, he said that many times we worry so much about the big decisions and we do not realize that regardless of the decision, God will guide our small steps. He will bring us to the place we need to be in small steps. So we have to just make a decision in faith, and God will lead us no matter what. Trust him. I definitely needed to hear that. I have been worrying so much about making the wrong decision, but I don't think I'll be making a wrong decision here, if I'm seeking God in all of it. I'm beginning to think that he'll use whichever decision I make and work through it.

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

-Colleen

...silence...

I am writing an essay. It's quiet. I've given up listening to music for a while. I hear this generation is the most distracted generation. We are afraid to face silence. We crowd our days with music and television and facebook and movies. Then we wonder why God doesn't speak to us. Perhaps it's because the world is too loud to hear the small whisper. So I gave it up. Music. Facebook. Television. Texting. Movies. I hope to hear more of God's voice on this endeavor. I have some decisions to make, and I really need to know what He wants for me. Oh how desperately I want to know.

I realize though, that it's not possible to get away from music. Music plays in the background everywhere! In the coffee shop, at the dining hall, in the dorm rooms. We really have drowned out our lives with music. It's crazy how that happens.

I am so sleepy. I do not think I can finish this essay right now.

Be silent for a day...or two...or more. See what happens.

-C